Wednesday, April 20, 2016

The Goat Selfie Project: first two days

Turns out, I don't really know how to take a proper selfie.

I hadn't given the matter much thought. Actually, I hadn't given it ANY thought. My last couple of years have actually been pretty happy. But. There's this thing in our lives, a bit of medical mystery misery caused by Curly having a weirdo medical condition (which is almost diagnosed but still noooot quiiiite and also the reason for no posts for years). It kind of sucks. And it doesn't really make the mind wander to: Am I Being My Best Selfie Taker?

So. Monday I was hanging out with the goats (Olive and Abelard). As one does. And Olive was being marvelously snuggly, as he pretty much always is once he remembers to stop being perversely goaty and cuddle up. He was making great Blue Steel. My phone was in my pocket  because I was waiting for a call back from the Children's Hospital (Curly's medical condition - which we call Darth - has been misbehaving a little bit). And I thought: selfie with goat! We'll both Blue Steel, Olive with goat face, me with duck face. This is what happened:

Turns out, it's a fail. That's not really a duck face, and it is absolutely NOT Olive's best Blue Steel, although obviously he is giving good goat. Curly threw some shade. And somehow, I decided to embark on the Goat Selfie Project. Because when your teenage daughter throws shade about the quality of your selfies and your duck face, it's time to behave in a childish and immature way?

Day 2 went little better. I kind of love snuggling Olive. Abelard... well, he's sweet, but often decides that the way to show he's happy about lying down and being petted is to hoof me in the shin really hard. Repeatedly.

Turns out, it can be hard to make Blue Steel and/or duck face when feeling content.

And retakes with goats can be a little tough. Because the goat wants to check if the phone or camera is a snack (dude. NO). And then the goat drool needs to be removed, and then the talent (Olive, obviously) gets huffy about the lack of total devotion to him and wanders off.

But someday, I'll have a selfie with Olive that both does justice to Olive's AMAZING Blue Steel, and in which I manage to give decent face.